When you or your spouse are struggling with substance abuse, the impact can be felt in every aspect of your life and marriage. It has destroyed many marriages, and the marriages that survive substance abuse are where both individuals made a full and honest commitment to repair the relationship.
Here are a few steps to take to repair your marriage after it’s impacted by substance abuse.
End the addiction.
The first step is to stop the cycle of addiction in the family by getting clean and solidly on the road to long-term recovery. Eliminating any drugs and alcohol is only the first step; you have to address the underlying issues that lead to the addiction and the behaviors that developed from the addiction. For example, you may have done things that broke the trust between you and your partner. It would help if you addressed the behaviors that make your partner not able to trust you. The Hope House is a luxury rehab center that provides clients with therapists to help with their addiction and behavioral issues. They will teach you to find workable solutions to your problems in a short period of time, so you stop turning to substances to avoid problems. They will help you with vulnerability so that you can increase your healthy relationships. Going to an inpatient facility will allow you to eliminate distractions and focus on your recovery.
Commit to each other.
To repair your marriage, both you and your spouse need to be open to repairing the marriage. Sometimes the damage done is too great, or both partners are not willing to work together to make it better. When one partner feels hurt or betrayed, they may not get past that and trust again. This is particularly true if there was domestic violence or infidelity in the marriage. To have a good marriage, the married couple must both be open to couples therapy and individual therapy because the problems are highly complex and have impacted your individual mental health needs. For those on the brink of divorce, a full commitment from both partners is needed.
Consider an intensive program.
Marriage counseling retreats provide couples with an opportunity to leave their everyday life for a few days and focus solely on repairing their marriage. A marriage retreat is the best way to eliminate distractions and work with a therapist to get to the root of the problem. The therapist can help you deal with the emotional consequences of infidelity, an emotional affair, financial dishonesty, or other specific issues that arose in your relationship. The emotional consequences of these issues often lead to mental health problems, which need to be acknowledged and addressed.
While a marriage retreat may not seem feasible with your families and work schedules, you need to decide how important repairing your marriage is and then give that level of priority to the actions that will accomplish that goal. While you may doubt if your marriage can ever be repaired, a trained marriage counselor can work with you during your private retreat to bridge the gap that developed between you.
All marriages go through hard times and get damaged over time. The difference between the couples that make it through together and those who get divorced is their willingness to get help and repair the damage. That willingness has to come from both partners. One can not expect the other to forgive something if they are unwilling to show they are worthy of trust again. Marriages are complex relationships, and repairing them after the damage is done is a long and intensive process, but it is possible.